i am treuly sorry if i am guilty. of any negative aspects that my choises have on the world and ask for forgiveness to every single human beiing i treuly do

hello i have spend the entire day of thinking about al thinngs that are making me who i am and at the same time cousing all forms of hell that are in my life and did this the right way and opend up my mind that i needed to accept all things that were truth but also many things that are untreu or create that hel or at least have a share of what creates izt and i also needed to accept some things that i was convinced that they where treu but was mislead by probebly my own ego and made me handling ín ways i probebly was better of if i didnt did this in the position i am now but i was totaly onest when at the same time i asked myself the question that if i needed to live this life again would i have done it the same way? and aldo i never ever would wish a hel that i get myself in but could only gave the answer that came straight from my hart and could only gave the right answer with the details in it to proove it to the self and that answer was nothing else than yes i would never choose fot a life where al this hel that i expirience is in but if i had chosen for a life without that hel i have never achieved the things i do realy valeu in my self and are realy proud of that i can treuly say that this is not a thing that comes from my ego becose i needed to be totaly onest about that was the same part that also was often part of al my insecurety that i treuly do expiriense most of the time becose i confes i am verry insecure about myself and had this during my entire life and also this is a key that my ego could use for trapping me in his prison but that part in wich. i have no insecurety at all ís the part that is what i think is good in my self and can say i am realy proud of that i am or have become in this path and realy has a higher priorety in the valeu i give to what i wish i would never wil in any life and that what i never want to loose in any life and i gave the things that i never would loose a higher valeu than those i would never expirience again so i gave my self a higher valeu and could only respond to the self yes i would live it the same way but also with the most treu answer that if i havent lived this or a life again i rather be not part of that life and would say that i only lived that life exactly the same if i had no choise and needed to live that life again becose if not living a life was a option to than i would have chosen that option and that was everything the self needed to hear from me that this was not coming from my ego but from my treu lower self who i am becose it did say much about my valeus of what i want and especialy what i dont want and is making me who i am and again i am not happy with much aspects of my self i realy do and i wil confes al these in treuest way i can becose i have much fear in life and am verry insecure much of the time and also am not finishing many things that i choose to do but they are also things that have not much valeu at the fear in my life i can also explain but must also at the same time say that not any one is guilty of trying to make me fear them but is coming from the truth that i am in circels or at least was in circels of people doing al wrong things and you may call them criminals but i think entirely my own way about those things and do respect them as normal human beying not as evil beyings becose i realy dont think their evil but think they lack the consiousness. to oversee their actions and handle in the same way a normal human beying does most of the times to enrichen their lives by getting a high status or position in reality and all normal human beying do this often by becoming as rich as they can achieve only crimenals dont have any ways to do this like most humans do becose they have no option the system gave them to achieve this becose the envirement in wich they have grown didnt suport a education that can get you somewere and with this they are not even suported by the system with a normal income that can give you a live that is worth living so like all beyings would do find Another way to reach this and espacialy when your envirement is ful of violence and crime you learn this verry soon so i do not judge them for their actions becose i treuly believe that the system is responseble for al of this becose they would have become that same human beying the system labels as normal good human beyings if they had grown up in a entire different envirement so in my judgement the system is guilty of their actions not them so i always treat them as human beyings and dont feel so much that i must avoid those cirkels much of the time becose they deserve as much as respect and love and compasion as every human beying and i am more intune with them as i am with the normal human beyings becose aldo we do react in different ways but both feel the pain that the system has done to them and me and also the normal human beying so i do also give them a chance to be accepted in my life as much as i accept every beying that lives becose i think not one single beying is unworthy to be accepted and i